The One Where We Explain the 'Why'

The internet is full of apps and sites that function as social media spaces—so why create something like this?

This is a question we’ve asked ourselves over and over, both before we created HereWithYou and as we kept building it. The ‘imposter syndrome’ was oh-so-present, as well as the general anxieties and fears that could come with creating something like this: what if it doesn’t catch on, what if people don’t want another site/app, what if certain people hate it, what makes us more worthwhile or special compared to the more established social media sites (.e.g, Facebook, Reddit, Instagram)?

But in the midst of all those fears and worries, we centered ourselves and thought back to the origin of why we started this in the first place: because people (all of us, when we choose to be kind to one another) deserve something better than what we’ve been given. The classic social medias we all think of (Facebook, Instagram, etc.) have the money and resources behind them, and huge teams that keep them functioning; but there are bureaucratic issues and questionable, moral drivers that plague them. And that creates the types of environments that can be toxic, unhealthy, and truly harmful to all of us.  We asked ourselves, “If we’re hurting, and so are others in our communities—what can we do and how can we help?”

We bought our site domain on January 20th, 2025 by no coincidence. The words, behaviors, and actions of the leaders being brought into power—who have so much sway over the everyday lives of so many people—were incredibly disheartening and set off our moral compass alarms. To us, it doesn’t matter what direction you lean politically—but what we do stand firmly on is how you choose to speak, show up for, and act towards others, both face-to-face and when they are not around. We’ve experienced this individual in this powerful role prior, and we have felt the rippling effects of their words and actions take hold of a nation. Ways of speaking to others that are rude, bullying, harmful, uncaring, and lack compassion and empathy. Actions that intentionally seek to harm others, simply because they disagree with this person, they present differently, or they have different life experiences. And all of this with a candor and bravado that helps foster, sow, and embolden the same problematic behavior in others. We firmly and unapologetically believe that everyone deserves to be treated with decency—with care and compassion, fairness and respect, empathy and open-mindedness. Deep down, no matter which way each of us leans politically and socially, we know that those basic expectations are rooted in and believed by many: including those who  might have chosen to vote for this person. 

With this election, negative interpersonal interactions correspondingly followed, and then came chilling, yet unsurprising outcomes. Meta—the parent company of Facebook, Instagram, and Threads—changed their community standards to align with the current administration’s belief systems. One that allows for bullying of queer and trans people in the online space. And for us, that in combination with the political climate, was the tipping point. 

As an organization whose founders work full-time in the world of healthcare and education, we see and know the devastating impacts actions like these have on adults and youth alike. We witness firsthand the direct and secondary harm of cultivating a culture of distrust, judgment, and hate across a nation and communities. And of course, we’re here to help pick up the pieces, listen without judgment, and work together to come up with solutions and try better ways to prevent these unnecessary challenges from even occurring. We exist in a country that is reactionary instead of preventative—that waits until something is so broken or hurting that by the time we get around to fixing it, it takes seemingly insurmountable amounts of work. And we recognize that sometimes waiting until the last minute is all we as individuals have the capacity to do, depending on what circumstances we’re facing in our own lives. We also have wisdom from previous generations and ordinary people here in the present, who can help us grow to be better, learn to coexist and live in harmony amongst one another, and treat one another with the decency we all deserve—no matter how we show up in this world.

We’re both LGBTQ+ and female co-created and led. We experience firsthand the backpedaling of progress and the resultant harm to our subset of communities. We have our own histories and life stories that inform how we experience the world. We help mold and educate the minds of young and sweet little humans; and through the realm of nursing we care and promote healing for those experiencing physical and mental illness. We have over a decade of experience and development in these fields, and we remain informed on the literature and research to best serve the very humans we collaborate with each day. We don’t have investors that can sway how we develop as an organization or even a small business loan to help kickstart us—and we’re not getting paid by anyone to create and maintain this space. Quite the contrary, this is 100% volunteer-created, operated, and maintained. We’re every-day ordinary people, just like you. Ones who chose to spend the small amount of savings we’d normally budget for something like a vacation—and invest incredible and relentless amounts of unpaid time and energy—on this. Because you, and we, deserve better.

We’re not here to dabble—we’re here to get to work, and disrupt, the status quo.

What WE think makes us different is the dedicated unification of our core elements all in one platform. We’re a space that helps you connect and build communities through various means, similar to the traditional social media sites you’ve become accustomed to. But we’re also a hub with evidence-based, mental well-being resources to help disrupt the toxic and harmful health effects that arise from mindless and addictive scrolling, disrespectful exchanges fueled by ‘keyboard courage’, and tactical features that intentionally keep you coming back for more, yet  simultaneously leaving you anxious, depressed, and overwhelmed. ANDDD we’re also a podium to showcase and uplift incredible humans—the BIPOC, female, and LGBTQ+ communities—simply because we think showing up for and shining the spotlight on one another is the kind and right thing to do. We strive to be something different: an equality-focused community that’s deeply rooted in values of decency and one that sets expectations of conduct for those who choose to join the space. We’re a gathering place that’s been sown from a seed of kindness and care for one another since the very beginning, and one that promises to keep that seed growing and thriving. 

We’re big believers in energy—both in how it exchanges as well as its karmic nature. The energy we put out is often the energy we receive. Even if we don’t receive positivity in return, it doesn’t mean we change course. And in the midst of darkness, that sustained energy can come through as light. We don’t have the power to control others and what they choose to do, but we do have the power to control ourselves, how we react, and what we choose to put out and forward into this world. 

Thanks for joining us as we channel our energies to bring light into this rather challenging world. Your presence alongside us means more than words can express. There’s so much yet to come as well as paths bound to be riddled with unknowns and moments of growth—but we’re glad to be doing it all, HereWithYou. 

With much love and deep warmth,

Your HereWithYou Team ❤︎